


Goodbye Apathy

by CapConspicuous



Category: Supernatural
Genre: !!!, Castiel Plays the Piano, Dean Sings, Destiel - Freeform, Destiel High School AU, First Kiss!, Fluff, High School AU, M/M, OneRepublic songs, Recovery, Wow, cute fic, destiel talent show, garth and charlie are only mentioned haha but I love them, good and wholesome, goodbye apathy, mentions of depression, my faves, no angst i promise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-25
Updated: 2016-11-25
Packaged: 2018-09-02 05:18:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8652466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CapConspicuous/pseuds/CapConspicuous
Summary: "It's going to be fine- just like auditions and rehearsal," Cas easily starts to roll up the sleeves of his dress shirt up to his elbows, clearly unbothered by the idea of performing in front of people. Hundreds of people.  Of course, he's good at the piano and is used to recitals and such.  Dean on the other hand, is not.He's never performed in front of this many people before. And after this, never again.
 
Aka the high school talent show AU that no one asked for but y'all are gonna get anyways.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, yes, I know that Dean probably wouldn't be OneRepublic fan #1 and he would, more characteristically, choose an AC/DC, Metallica, Led Zeppelin, or Beatles song (etc., etc.) to perform but. But. I love this song, okay, please give it a listen! Goodbye Apathy by OneRepublic. 
> 
> Comments and kudos keep me alive ;*

Never in a million years could Dean have seen this coming. Never. _Never, ever, ever._

His palms are slick with sweat, and of course he's fiddling with the hem of his sophisticated-looking dress shirt like a fool. Cringing, Dean immediately removes his hands to his thighs when he realizes what he's doing. Wipes the moisture off on his black pants.

A hand brushes his shoulder, making him flinch, but it's only Cas, eyes gentle and encouraging.

"Relax, Dean," he laughs, and curiously, the sound puts Dean more at ease.

He takes a steadying breath. "I'm trying," Dean groans, "It's not working."

"It's going to be fine- just like auditions and rehearsal," Cas easily starts to roll up the sleeves of his dress shirt up to his elbows, clearly unbothered by the idea of performing in front of people. Hundreds of people. Of course, he's good at the piano and is used to recitals and such. Dean on the other hand, is not.

He's never performed in front of this many people before. And after this, _never_ again.

Sweat prickles at the back of his neck and Dean finds himself scowling anxiously. He loves singing, and he loves the song, but what he does not happen to like is the sensation of people staring at him. _Hundreds of people._

Cas gives a soft sigh and with an hand of each of Dean's shoulders, turns Dean to face him. "It'll be alright," He smiles, "Besides, you'll be up there with me."

It's true, but at this point, Dean isn't sure if that fact makes him relieved or even more nervous. He knows Cas can perform perfectly, but what if he messes up? What if _he's_ the one one who screws up? Just the thought makes him feel panicked.

They're behind the curtain, AC blasting away just as the speakers are; Charlie Bradbury is in the middle of rocking her way through "Walking On Sunshine", and she sounds amazing. Dean shivers, feeling clammy and impossibly self-conscious. They're next.

_Oh, God._

"Hey, Dean," Cas is giving him a firm shake, snapping him out of whatever horrific scenario he is imagining, "Look at me." Dean fixes his eyes on Cas's obediently. " _Breathe._ Okay? You want me to count?" Dean shakes his head slowly, breathing as steadily as he can; Cas knows how to calm him down and divert his worse panic attacks- Dean appreciates that with the whole of his heart, but he usually tries his best on his own. _Inhale. Three seconds. Exhale. Three seconds._

By the time Charlie's last notes fade, Dean's heart rate has decreased somewhat and he no longer in immediate danger of spiraling out of control. Still, the butterflies in his stomach are rioting and the uproar of the audience clapping doesn't help matters. He takes one last deep inhale as the emcee, Garth Fitzgerald, begins his chirpy announcement of the next performers. Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak.

Castiel fixes his small mouthpiece/microphone to his ear. With an easy grin, he tugs Dean to the edge of the stage, where they're still out of sight, but ready to go. Dean can't stop himself from grabbing on to Cas's wrist with no intention of ever letting go.

Dean leans in shakily, tripping over his words. "What if I forget the lyrics?" He feels disheveled and horribly sweaty, whereas Cas is immaculate in his dress shirt and pants, complete with a blue bow tie. Granted, Dean's outfit is exactly the same, but he doesn't feel like he's pulling the look off as much.

"Just improv, Dean, just sing what you know," Cas is almost too gentle, too supportive for Dean to handle, "I think you'll do great." Cas slips his wrist up and out of Dean's grip -Dean's heart stops for a good long moment- only to readjust so their hands are clasped. He gives Dean a soft squeeze before Garth gives the cue for them to emerge.

"Feel the music, Dean- the words. Let it run through you, you know? Don't focus on the audi-" Ironically, the crowd's enthusiasm cuts off Cas's wise words before they step, blinking, onto the stage.

Dean finds himself thinking about the song they're performing, just thinking about it dazedly, like everything is being viewed through a haze.

"Goodbye Apathy" by OneRepublic is one of Dean's favorite songs- it's been a long year, and somehow, the song feels like waking up. It's optimistic and good and everything he wants.

Cas knows what the song means to Dean. Cas knows how depressed Dean can get- not just the emotion of depression, but the mental illness of depression.

Like he said, it's been a long year.

The song is symbolic and sappy, and Dean wanted to perform it as some sort of proof that he's overcome an obstacle. But now he feels like he just jumped out of an airplane without a parachute.

The time between when they step out from behind the curtain and take their places on stage seems to be a millenia. Semi-consciously, Dean finds that he's trying his best not to look out into the audience for as long as possible. Someone has already rolled out the sleek, black grand piano so that it sits waiting for Cas to take a seat. Faintly, Dean wonders what the hell made him think this was a good idea. His life isn't an inspirational movie for God's sake.

But then, suddenly, Cas is sitting down at the piano bench. And Dean finds himself in front of the microphone. The lights are dim in the auditorium, except for the spotlight shining in Dean's face. His heart stutters in panic just looking up at the ceiling, but he slowly lowers his gaze until he's just staring out into the building, into the open faces of a good three hundred students and parents. Somewhere among them, his family is there as well.

Dean very much wishes he could just disappear.

Instead, Cas starts playing softly, notes sliding their way into the air- notes that Cas brilliantly compiled together just by listening to Dean's favorite song. So, no, Dean can't leave. Because it's not just him on stage.

With something like muscle memory, he counts the beats until he has to open his mouth and sing. He knows he's a good singer, but he feels trapped and stranded and--

_"I can't sleep, no... not like I used to."_

The words slip out, a bit quieter than he had intended, but they fall out and that's what counts. Dean's heart is racing and he's trying his hardest not to sing too fast.  
 _"I can't breathe in and out like I need to."_

He's shifting his weight from foot to foot uneasily. "Feel the music", Cas had said- Dean tries his best- tries his very hardest to find his place within Cas's silver piano notes.

_"It's breaking ice now, to make any movement,"_ Dean catches the higher note just fine and sort of just eases into the next line, _"What's your vice? You know that mine's the illusion."_

His sweaty hands grasp at the microphone on its stand helplessly-

_"And all at once..."_

And all at once, Dean's voice is joined by Cas's, a lower undertone that's made of reassurance and comfort, and Dean feels all of the nervous energy push out of him in a tidal wave.

Cas sounds like heaven. _"All I'm trying 's just to get things right, I'd kill myself to make everything perfect for you,"_ Cas croons it like a promise, and, just like all the other times before, Dean nearly forgets the lines he's supposed to be singing at the same time.

But he doesn't. Instead, he pours his heart out into the chorus, until his words are as sweet and smooth as honey. _"I can help you out, I'll be what you need, I'll do anything... Goodbye apathy..."_

The piano becomes the forefront for a few seconds, reigning over the audience's silence, before Dean sings, _"So long... apathy."_

Somewhere between his last words and the next, Dean finds that he's not staring out into the audience anymore. He's got his head tilted in Cas's direction, where his best friend of ten years is rocking that dress shirt and gelled hair, with an expression so full of rapture, Dean's heart could just burst. It almost hurts to care so much.

_"So don't sit still, but don't you move away from here..."_ Dean puts his own pleading and confusion into the words, as much as he can possibly enunciate. _"So goodbye apathy, so long fancy free... Goodbye apathy, I don't wanna be you..."_ Even as he sings the next part of the chorus, Cas repeats his line again. Dean lives for the moment their voices trail off together.

_"I don't walk right, not like I used to,"_ he shuts his eyes involuntarily for a moment, _"There's a jump in my step as I rush to see you."_ How many times had he felt the same way, hurrying to meet Cas after classes? _"I could be happy here, as long as you're near to me, as long as you're close to me._

_Now that I'm all right..."_

From there on out, it's all a bit of a blur- if Dean isn't looking in Cas's general area, he's staring at the auditorium's back wall, losing himself in the lyrics. He sings every word like he's talking to his best friend- like he's confessing to him, and that's exactly what it feels like.

He's still sweaty, but the chills are gone, instead replaced by currents of heat that overtake his face. Dean ignores it as much as possible, trying to think of nothing else but how much this means to him.

It no longer feels like jumping out of an airplane. It feels more like flying.

_"Everybody is watching is you,"_ Dean feels a small smile light up his face, _"Everybody is watching me too."_ He loves the ironic words because everybody is watching them, loves how it just makes it seem more like he's just talking to Cas, like they're sharing a private joke.

More than ever he wishes it was just the two of them, so he could just look at Cas and know Cas would turn and look back.

_"Everybody is watching you."_ He feels like a laugh is bubbling up in his throat, _"Everybody is-"_

_"I can't sleep, no,"_ Cas husks over his words, _"Not like I used to..."_

_"Everybody is watching you-"_

_"I can't breathe in-"_

_"Everybody is watching me too-"_

_"It's breaking ice, now-"_

_"Everybody is watching you-"_

_"What's your vice?"_

_"Everybody is watching me too."_

And just like that, the song is over- Cas is getting up and striding towards him, and Dean's trembly hands let go of the microphone. The crowd is roaring impossibly loudly- the two of them bow once, just once, before Dean is grabbing Cas or it's the other way around and they're hugging impossibly tightly.

" _You did it_ ," is Cas's fierce whisper and proud grin as he pulls back, "I told you, Dean, you were _awesome_ -"

It's the way Cas says it, because he knew all along- it's the way he's got one hand at the base of Dean's neck like he's cradling him. It's the fact that Dean knows that Cas knows nearly everything about him and that Cas will always be there. It's completely and utterly the luminosity of Cas's smile- and yet, ultimately, there is no single reason why Dean chooses to lean in and kiss his best friend.

In front of an audience of roughly three hundred.

It only lasts a second, maybe- though Dean will never be able to tell if it felt like an eternity or a nanosecond.

All he knows is, when they pull back, Cas is smiling even brighter and that's a good sign. He knows that he will be happy. He knows that the sight of ruffled, breathless Cas could erase the screams of a thousand people easily. Dean knows for sure, one hundred percent, that the blue of Cas's eyes will be his favorite color forever.

Dean laughs shakily, heart thudding as he tries to keep both of them steady. Tries to keep himself from leaning in again. "Why, hello there."


End file.
